The rest of the story is about to explode from the lips of my close relative and it will not be a pretty sight! Her eyes are bulging, her lips are pursed and her fists are clinched. I would rather be back in the deep mud and muck of a cold January windblown day with four flats and no help coming than run full face with the lady of the house today!
The male offspring came along pretty late yesterday afternoon and proceeded to pull out to the shop to work on their hay equipment. They are both very conscious of putting things away clean and ready to use the next time they are needed. Don’t think my close relative doesn’t appreciate that particular action; she does. She also loves those two offspring way more than life and would fight a circle saw to protect either one of them. It is also her right to tie into one or both at any time she deems necessary.
The fall yard work required some of the old timbers around a few flower beds to be pulled up and replaced. The replacement articles were shopped and shopped for; many hours of looking, pricing and figuring were involved. Wood will rot after so many years of rain, sun and over-fertilizing so other sorts of dividers were considered. The final decision was made at long last and the check was written. I almost fainted, but once again recovered and sold some cows to cover the cost.
A bobtail truck delivered the new iron trellises and all the fancy little corner pieces needed to make the wrought iron look just dandy. It was not a little load of stuff.Johnny Cash would have called it pig iron, but I dared not, and we unloaded it in a handy spot. My close relative walked around the pile with her list and checked every little piece off her list before she let the truck leave. It was all there.
The tractors were inside the shop and things were getting organized when the younger of the two decided he needed to wash themower, backed out of the shop without so much as glancing toward the corner where it would be handy to stack stuff and that old tractor climbed right to the top of the heap and sat there with a real stupid look on the driver’s face.
I was at the barn repairing a gate when I heard the racket. Shocked, scared, wanting to run, all of the above and then some is how I felt. Then I wanted to get mad as the dickens and have a fit but I saw her coming and decided to forego that episode as she could take care of it all by herself!
It is my opinion, and everyone has one, accidents happen and that’s what they are, accidents. No one plans an accident because then they wouldn’t be accidents. You cannot make it a fault and no one ever expects to make one. Am I making any sense? No matter, because it is all said and done and the fur has flown!
I want you to know the younger of the male offspring has offered to do all the yard work himself, straighten or replace all bent and broken items. That is fine and good, but then he went to his house and I had to stay at hers!
Bill is a pen name used by the Gravette author of this column.
Opinion, Pages 6 on 10/27/2010