LOOKING BACK: Our hearts have grown fonder

Mom invented the phrase “cheaper by the dozen” long before Hollywood conned the phrase.

Mom always wanted 12 children. After I was born - number six, the middle child, and mostly a loner - I guess Mom was fearful she was through producing. So, they adopted my next three siblings. Then, surprise, surprise! They had three more - Joy, Gay and Cynthia. That made seven girls.

Another sisters’ reunion has come and gone. We weren’t sure Helen would make it, as her husband had a heart attack a few months ago. But they made the nearly 12-hour drive from Mississippi. My oldest sister, Lela, flew in from Arizona. Cynthia’s leg started acting up again. It had been diagnosed as cancer four years ago, but now doctors just claim it’s a lesion. Still, we were surprised she made the six-hour drive from Texas. We didn’t know about Betty. She’d had serious heart surgery about a year before. She and her husband decided once again to spend the summer (from hot Texas) in the cool Ozarks. So, wonder of wonder, all seven of us girls made it to our get-together, Gay and Joy driving from Missouri.

My six sisters stayed at a bed and breakfast in Bentonville. They chose to come to this area so I wouldn’t have to leave my husband. That’s how thoughtful they are. I tried to be with them as much as possible, leaving my brother-in-law and son to keep Jerry company. One morning I went over early and ate a gourmet breakfast with them. As usual, our favorite thing to do is play Mexican Train. The minute I’d arrive at their lodging, I’d say, “Let’s play.” Maybe the reason we enjoy it so much is because we can say anything, like “I never win” or “You are so slow!”

I have a friend who only has one sister, and they are not close. She is so envious of the relationship I have with my sisters. It’s hard to figure. We weren’t close growing up. Maybe it’s because now we don’t have to sleep together, do chores together, etc.

“Distance makes the heart grow fonder,” they say.

Once we became adults, our relationship changed. We love each other, and love being with each other. It’s as if I take a mini-vacation when we are together. As I once wrote, “When I’m with my sisters, I recharge.”

We examine our roots. It once again defines who I am as I realize I am who I am because of my sisters. They appreciate and love me and never criticize me, yet they know all my flaws. They appreciate me and have no resentment toward me.

I wrote about our relationship, “You are totally accepted, even though everyone knows what a turkey you are.”

Every time we get together, we bond some more. When I’m with them, I’m totally happy and have fun.

In the past we would discuss our children and grandchildren, later we began talking about our aches and pains and medicine we were taking and operations we’d had. This time we talked of dying and where we would be buried. It seems morbid, but it just shows our age.

I’ve known these gals since we were children. We’ve come a long way!

Marie Putman is a former Gravette resident and regular contributor to the Westside Eagle Observer.

Opinion, Pages 4 on 07/17/2013