Here we are, already into the "merry month of May" and spring weather seems to have come to stay. The early purple iris are still putting on quite a show and now a sunny yellow variety and a pale lavender have bloomed out and enhanced the display. We're beginning to hear a chorus of spring peepers in the evenings and the birds are singing even more sweetly as the weather has warmed up.
One of them, a tiny wren, has taken up residence in the birdhouse hanging at the end of my front porch. While she busies herself with readying the nest, her mate perches on the porch rail or in a nearby bush pouring out his song. He seems to be overflowing with good news about the impending additions to the family.
We certainly hope we've seen our last frost. We waited until the last Saturday of April before we bought our tomato plants. Jim planted them Monday of last week only to learn there was a forecast for frost a couple of days later. Lows on Wednesday hovered right around the freezing mark and Jim wasn't convinced we needed to cover our plants, but I remembered the old saying, "better safe than sorry." I put tomato cages on the plants at each corner of our raised beds and dragged out an old bedspread and a blanket to drape over them and make a protective tent. Maybe my effort was unnecessary, but I wanted to save the trouble of replanting.
Last Saturday was a beautiful sunny day and we visited the farmers' market to buy a few more tomatoes. We had only a small space but we got a trio of plants, a red cherry tomato and a couple of the Big Beef variety. Since the four-o-clock seed I planted about a month ago hadn't come up, I also purchased a dozen dianthus plants. When we got home, I filled the birdbath with water, filled the fish pond and watered our outdoor plants, then set out the new arrivals in the front flower beds. I spaced them about a foot apart, alternating rose pink and white flowers, and watered them well before the afternoon sun hit them. They're looking pretty perky and add a bright spot of color beside the front steps.
The citywide yard sale was last weekend and I visited one of the sales on Main Street after leaving work Friday. I found a few nice items for gifts and, of course, one can always use another picture frame or more candles and candle holders so I bought a few of those. Some artificial greenery helped fill the empty planter on the front porch but the biggest bargain I found was a treasure of a book, "Butterfly Gardens," published by the Brooklyn Botanic Garden. It includes a wealth of information on designing butterfly gardens, and features an extensive list of plants which attract butterflies and an "encyclopedia of butterflies" with excellent pictures of each species and details about their range, habitat and preferred food plants. I felt like a prospector who'd just struck gold!
With a limited income and increasing demands on my time, I delight in shopping at yard sales and thrift stores. Finding a bargain at one of these spots is more fun to me than browsing the fancy designer label shops with their inflated prices.
Alexandra Stoddard's "Living Beautifully Together" recommends taking 10 percent of one's time for activities you enjoy, such as yard saling, reading, sewing, gardening, painting, whatever your personal pleasure may be. Don't feel guilty, Stoddard says, because this still leaves 90 percent of your time for others, and everyone needs a regular break.
Women especially tend to be mother hens and feel they should always be around to meet the needs of their husbands and children. But we have to learn to feel comfortable about occasionally being unavailable to others. Stoddard maintains it isn't healthy to "be there" all the time, not even for a spouse, a child, a friend or a parent. She recommends we think of time nurturing ourselves as recess. Teachers have a snack, she says. Marching soldiers get 10 minute breaks every hour so they can march farther. Ministers take time out to meditate and go on retreats to renew themselves.
So take your breaks. Disappear and take a nap or take a walk alone. Learn to feel comfortable with yourself when you escape. Concentrate on being there for yourself on a regular basis. After all, self-caring is being responsible. Remember that all the time spent cultivating yourself will enrich your life and strengthen your relationships with others.
Susan Holland is a staff member of the Westside Eagle Observer and a lifelong resident of Benton County. She may be reached by email at [email protected]. Opinions expressed are those of the author.
Editorial on 05/07/2014