The weather has been good for growing grass and weeds, sure am proud of that grass part. I would like to take this time to announce I am willing to enter my great crop of thistles in any contest in the country. They are bigger, better fleshed, greener and blooming earlier with huge flowers than anyone else’s in this neck of the woods! I would surely be a winner in any category.
I’ve been digging thistles for two days now. I am very thankful for leather gloves and calloused hands. A tenderfoot could never make it on this rock pile. And that raises the question, how do thistles grow so dang well on rocky to the nth degree ground? My close relative had a cousin visiting one time who thought these were the prettiest flowers she had seen since leaving the city! Oh yes, and I gave her some seed too! Just being neighborly.
But seriously and this is a serious problem, how in the heck can a feller stay ahead of them and purple mint and a long list of other weeds that are a danger to our cattle? Who knew we would be capable of losing bovine to so many weeds, let alone the loss of nutrients and water they suck from the ground. They also crowd out grass that we need. Both of our male offspring are on tractors mowing the fields as fast as they can but we know the thistles will bloom on stalks about half an inch high if they have to.
I know about all thepollen problems and how the breeze stirs that pot, but can you visualize the feathery seeds of the thistle as they blow in the tiniest little puff of air? They are so aerodynamic that a grasshopper moving around stirs them into a frenzy! Am I right? You bet! They travel on wind currents, animal hides, bug wings and a feller’s clothes. I’d not be surprised if they are carried along in tire treads. I don’t think anything eats them; they are at the top of the food chain for weeds!
I have spent lots of hard earned cash, and some the banker let me use, on poisons to spray thistles. I suffered with neck cramps from trying to spray individual thistles on the four wheeler. I’d ride about eight hours a day that year and talk about saddle sores, I had them. Did it do much good? Well, the ones I hit died but you can tell I did not kill them out. They are not on the endangered list!
It is my opinion, and everyone has one, I am afraid the world may one day be covered not by cement and people but by thistles! I intend to kill all I can and encourage all of you to do the same. Every time I think about that woman offering Adam a bite I wish, once again, he would have slapped that thing right out of her hand! We can’t help but recognize the hand of Satan in these dad blamed thistles!
-Bill
Bill is the pen name uses by the Gravette author of this weekly column.
Opinion, Pages 4 on 05/19/2010