As the years pass and we get older, it seems our children have to help us more. It's sometimes called "the sandwich years," for they are raising our grandchildren at the same time they try to meet our ever-growing needs.
Who would have ever thought, when I was taking care of my young children, that one day they would be taking care of me. I protected and cared for them through their vulnerable years. Now, I'm the one who is vulnerable and needy.
When Jerry and I married, we repeated our commitment vows to love and honor through sickness and health, for better or worse, for richer or poorer. Our children didn't make any vows; they're just stuck with us. I can only hope, for their sakes, there's not a lot of "worse."
I held onto my babies' hands as their toddling bodies learned to walk. Today, as they walk beside me, they often hold out their hands to steady me when I lose my balance, which I often do. When my kids were teens, I spent a lot of time worrying; now they worry about their parents.
I don't withhold my gratefulness from them, though. (Did our kids ever thank us for all we did? No. We didn't expect it.)
The last time Bill was home, he blew the leaves off the top of our house and cleaned out gutters. I couldn't thank him enough for all his help. We can no longer do those chores, so that really helped.
Every time Dan comes back, he sees what needs to be done, and he does it - like cleaning out sheds, hauling away trash and changing batteries - and the list is long. He even helped set our clocks ahead for daylight savings time.
Daughter Teresa is always available. She's cooked for us, helped with laundry and the like.
We supported our kids as they found their niche in life; now they support us. Who knew? When we applauded their graduations, careers and dreams, who would have dreamed they'd one day have to pay us back. When I was changing diapers, going to PTA and doing all those things for them while they were growing up, I never thought that one day they would be doing so much for us. The thought never entered my mind.
But, what would I do without them? I try not to feel guilty for all they do. I just tell myself it's pay back time.
When my mother moved her aging parents from Washington to Gravette, I'm sure she wanted to pay them back for all they had done for her. She found them a small house in Sulphur Springs where they spent many happy years, and she was able to look after them.
We've all heard the saying, "What goes around, comes around." Do you suppose that's what it means?
Marie Putman is a former Gravette resident and regular contributor to the Westside Eagle Observer.
Opinion, Pages 4 on 04/10/2013