Shoot, I forgot to go to the meeting for the explanation of the reason we need to enforce all the new laws of our county! Our basic laws have been declared obsolete and old, not worthy of being on the books and maybe even illegal. I think spitting on the sidewalk should still require at least a fine.
I missed the meeting because of my family being inconsiderate of my needs to do the citizenship stuff I feel is a required duty of the man of the house. My close relative decided, without talking to me or asking my opinion, that we would have a family night with all the good food and fun the bunch could provide. It was not anyone's birthday, not a holiday or even a weekend and yet we were fenced in and duly required to be in attendance. The whole deal put me in a snit.
I suppose you all understand that a snit is mostly pouting and being generally not nice. I am sure a good snit also requires a slight smirk around the mouth and a steely-eyed glare at nothing. Deep sighs are a nice addition to a serious snit, followed by a miserable-sounding throat clearing. I did it all and you can also believe that not one person paid one ounce of attention to me. I was completely ignored except for asking me to saddle the paint pony, and then I didn't even get a proper thanks.
A few minutes into the evening, after the feast of wonderful foods and two slabs of pie, I decided my snit was not being properly appreciated. No one, not even one of the Grands, seemed to give a hoot or notice that I was not my usual jolly self. We were all gathered into the dining room around the big table for a game of some kind with a lot of giggling expected. I gave up the snit, it was a real good one, but I cannot even begin to tell you how hard it is to stay focused in a snit while having a good time. I relaxed and enjoyed the rest of the evening, laughing and snacking along with the rest of the bunch.
The party broke up around eight and all the Grands were herded into vehicles for the trip to their designated homes and cozy beds. I checked the doors and turned off the lights in the kitchen and dining room. All the sounds of the evening were echoing around the empty rooms as I stood and listened.
It is my opinion, and everyone has one, a crabby old man or, for that matter, a cranky old woman is one thing we can do without! How blessed our family is, and how mean it is to have a personal little snit when something does not go exactly like you want! We make life easier and more enjoyable if the snits are saved for kids under the age of 3. I think they need a certain amount of snits to learn how to deal with the world.
I must have missed some of my childhood snits and they may be nipping at my heels, because I surely wouldn't have been so immature without some unnatural force picking at me! Keep your attitude in line, as I will endeavor to do!
Bill is the pen name of the Gravette area author of this weekly column. Opinions expressed are those of the author.
Editorial on 10/22/2014